I have Watched A Lot Of Cinema Recently...

I've been having some pretty shocking migraines this week, topped off with a very sore right side of my face and possible ear infection (well it feels like it at least). Why? Because I have some shocking teeth that need to be ripped out of my skull, it seems. Two fillings that have fallen out, some impacted wisdom teeth (they certainly feel like it) and others rotting away, it's time to see the dentist. But you see, I'm a wuss for seeing the dentist. I can't think of anything worse than teeth pain, really. It freaks me out in movies, and it certainly freaks me out in real life. However, I must bite the bullet and go see one this week otherwise I might have to be like Tom Hanks and ice-skate a tooth out myself, which I don't think I have the nerves for. For now I'm dosed up on painkillers, but still my face throbs away - I just can't bring myself to disregard the warnings on my packets of Nurofen, and chow down as many as I feel like. Yet 6 doesn't seem to be doing much... hmmm..

So that's my explanation of why I've not updated this in a few days - I just haven't been able to bring myself to sit in front of this here monitor for so long. But today I aim to write a couple of things at least - music post and some mini film reviews. Film reviews first, for once!:

Mini Film Review - or Films I Have Seen Over the Last Couple of Weeks, Reviewed in a Couple of Sentences:


Trailer Park Boys: The Big Dirty
Not a bad film, if you love the TPB as much as I do. Tailored to both hardcore fans of the series and newbies to the show - but not as funny as some of their series. Ricky and Lucy finally get married, trailer park styles. And they try and pull off the best job of all time - stealing change. 4 stars out of 5

Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story
Odd and enjoyable, there's 3 stories in Tristram Shandy: the making of the movie, the movie itself of the life of Tristram Shandy and the camera following Steve Coogan's time while making the movie. It has some very witty humour, very confusing bits and overall is an interesting film. Not the best Mike Winterbottom film, but original... that's for sure. 4 stars out of 5

The Inside Man
Went on a small Spike Lee kick this week. Inside Man is about a flawless bank robbery, and the stupidity of the police handling the situation. Really well done, made me think that robbing banks was easier than it looks. Worth checking out! 4 stars out of 5

Sucker Free City
Another Spike Lee film, this time about gangs in San Fransisco. Filmed interestingly, shows 3 different gang areas and how they all intersect. Didn't really like the sudden ending, or what strong point Lee was trying to get across. Worth watching though if you like gang films. 3 stars out of 5.

25th Hour
I love Edward Norton, and he's great in this as an ex-drug dealer who has a day to live before going to jail. You end up feeling for the protagonist, Norton, even though he's a criminal by trade. I enjoyed this immensely. 4 stars out of 5

Idiocracy
A film by Mike Judge (office space, king of the hill, beavis and butthead) that is pretty funny. About a man who's frozen for 100 years only to find he's the smartest man on earth because only the dumbest have been breeding. It it was real, the future looks bleak. 3 stars out of 5

Snakes on a Plane
Yeah so we watched this because we thought, why not. And the film is about as good as it sounds. All you need to know is that there's many poisonous, pissed off snakes on a plane with Samuel L. Jackson. Best line - "Snakes on crack." 1 star out of 5

Miami Vice
Since Michael Mann directed the film, I thought it'd be alright. But if anything it was more confusing. Colin Farrell has a shocking accent, Mann has his trademark blue tones and the story is a bit average. But then again, I never liked the show much. 2 stars out of 5

SWAT
Don't even bother. Nothing can save this film. Colin Farrell is shocking, and Samuel L Jackson is his usual hard ass yelling righteous black man self. 1/2 star out of 5.

Hot Fuzz
I love Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead, Spaced) and this film is really really good. It's basically a homage to the apparent best cop films of all time - Point Break and Bad Boys 2. Pegg plays a great hard ass, serious cop, in a small Cornish town where people are getting brutally murdered. Highly recommended if you want a great giggle. 4.5 stars out of 5

Harsh Times
Directed by David Ayers, the man who wrote Training Day, this film is great. Pretty messed up but great! Christian Bale plays an ex-military nutjob who rolls gangs, takes drugs, gets drunk and vicious with weapons while trying to secure a job with Homeland Security. Fantastic acting, despite the intense story plot. 4.5 stars out of 5

Taxi (1, 2 and 3) - the french series of films
Written by Luc Besson (The Professional, The Fifth Element) the Taxi series (4 films in all) are very funny and action packed. The main premise is about a taxi driver with a souped up race car taxi helps out the fumbling police, catching the bad guy in each film. But there's a continuity, joint smoking, great action sequences and lotsa French humour. Highly recommended for a giggle. 4 out of 5

Banlieue 13
Another film written by Luc Besson, this one is set in the future about a district in Paris that is riddled with gangs. A prison inmate and a cop must go in to diffuse a bomb and save thousands of people. This film has some fantastic stunts in it, mixing Martial arts and parkour together. Interesting concept, great action. 4 stars out of 5 (mainly for the use of parkour)

Pan's Labyrinth
Everyone loves this film, but I sadly was disappointed. I expected more. The Spanish love gruesome films, and this certainly is depressive subject matter wise. The special effects are interesting, kinda like watching a Tool video clip, but the story itself is gruesome and very depressing. You'll either like the film or not like it. 3 stars out of 5.

Gangs of New York
Scorsese put 25 years of research in for this film, and it shows. Mainly about a battle between Irish immigrants and 'native' American's of New York, the film highlights the life back then and what else was going on in America with the Civil War. Leonardo Di Caprio has a pretty shonky accent, Daniel Day Lewis is AWESOME as the antagonist, Cameron Diaz doesn't do that bad an Irish accent either. Maybe not the best Scorsese film, but one worth watching. 4 stars out of 5

Night At the Museum
Another Ben Stiller film. I personally don't like Ben Stiller much, unless he's in a Wes Anderson film. This is pretty stereotypical Stiller, with children's and obvious humour and slapstick comedy. It's entertaining, at most. I reckon the dinosaur was the best part. 2 stars out of 5

Déjà Vu
A Jerry Brockheimer film - that should say it all. Apparently a sci-fi thriller, I found this film tedious. Denzel Washington always plays a good cop, and in this he goes back in time to stop a bomb exploding hundreds of people. If anything, the budget went on the action sequences and special effects. 2 stars out of 5.

Swordfish
Operation Espadons, as my partner calls it. Not a bad film, John 'Scientologist' Travolta plays a pretty good villain, Hugh Jackman plays a great hacker - though he is daggy at some points. Halle Berry has a boob shot, and there's some pretty expensive action sequences. Entertaining. 3 stars out of 5.

Peeping Tom
I had to watch this for a class at school. It's a famous, controversial film from 1960 by Michael Powell, about a voyeur who's fetish is filming people being murdered. Interesting film, especially from a voyeur perspective, and if you like Hitchcock-like films. 4 stars out of 5

The Science of Sleep
The latest from Michel Gondry, I enjoyed this film muchly despite being confused for a lot of it. The story is a bit everywhere, but the visuals are amazing - more like watching a video clip than a film for parts of the film. Gael Garcia Benal is wonderful, and speaks in French, English and Spanish. 4 stars out of 5.

Crank
Another Jason Stratham film, this is a non-stop intense roller-coaster of action. Stratham is injected with a poison that means if his heart rate drops below a certain rate, he'll die. Basically the whole film is about him keeping his adrenaline levels up in order to get revenge on the person who injected him. A hell of a ride to watch. 4.5 stars out of 5.

Underworld: Evolution
The first Underworld didn't do anything for me, and this continues to do nothing for me. It's basically a lot of vampires fighting werewolves, and talking about how both came to be. There's an overly long sex scene with Kate Beckinsale and Scott Speedman, which I think is for the directors (and Beckinsale's husband) viewing pleasure more than anything. Beckinsale's character becomes a new species of vampire too. I like a good vampire film, but this isn't one of them. 2 stars out of 5.

Letters From Iwo Jima
Clint Eastwood's other film dealing with the battle of Iwo Jima (the other being Flags of Our Fathers), though this is from the Japanese perspective. And it's fantastic. Moving and easy to get wrapped up in, the film doesn't portray the Japanese as being unjustified, cruel soldiers. It highlights how unprepared the Japanese were, and how the Imperial Army left the soldiers to die. Highly recommended! 4.5 stars out of 5. (just make sure you get a copy with the RIGHT subtitles, not Engrish)


There was many other films too, but I've either forgotten I watched them due to being too long ago or them being too shocking to remember. On average I'm watching 2 films a night - yes I am a film fanatic. Along with that I have also been keeping up with the recent series (as shown in the USA recently) of:

House, MD
Heroes
Supernatural
Lost
The Simpsons
Family Guy (sometimes)
Law and Order: SVU

Gotta love the Internet.

Next film review post - I plan to watch Shortbus (if I can finally convince my partner to watch it), The Libertine, MirrorMask, Perfect Creatures, and other assorted films. Who knows what I'll whip out of my bag of movie tricks.

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